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Big Ideas
When was the last time you truly wanted to do something? And you thought that you are not good enough
Like wanted something so badly you could taste it… The delicious taste of a big idea sprinkled with lots of passion and a dash of hope for success.
Maybe you really wanted to start your own business…. grow in your career… be better at [insert awesome goal here].
Maybe last year…?
Perhaps last month…?
Or maybe it’s happening right now!
Big Impact
You lie awake at night unable to fall asleep because powerful ideas are rushing through your head so quickly… and, they’re such incredible ideas that you can’t bring yourself to go to sleep. All of a sudden “real life” is wayyy better than any dream you may have when asleep!
Maybe you can’t focus during the day because ideas just keep swishing around in your head…
You spend days, maybe even weeks or months, making lists of all your ideas. Then, more time making plans for how you’re going to get started. And, of course, you continue to dream about all the positive IMPACT your work will have on others… people you’ve never even met!
And then it happens… the cynical doubt monster rears its no-good, dream bashing head, and whispers, “Who are YOU to do THAT?”
The gates of positivity burst open and negative thoughts seep in, slowing overpowering your entrepreneurial, professional, and other goals.
I’m not an expert.
I don’t have enough experience.
Who would want to buy/learn something from me?
I don’t deserve…
On, and on, it goes. The negativity flows until those big ideas you had… those incredible and impactful dreams are silent.
“What happened?” a friend asks, wondering why your business isn’t up and running or you’re not going to job interviews.
“Oh… that,” you say, “It wasn’t for me.”
But, what you’re subconsciously saying is, “I don’t believe in myself enough to try and risk failing. Because failing is scary.”
You are suffering from Impostor Syndrome.
Impostor Syndrome – The Not Good Enough Feeling
If any (or heaven forbid all) of that sounds familiar, you, my dear friend, struggle with impostor syndrome.
What?
Simply put, you doubt your abilities.
You diminish your accomplishments.
You don’t think you’re good enough.
And, tough love time… you make excuses for not going after your goals!
“What if no one wants to hire me … or buy my product?”
“What if I get turned down for that job I want so badly?”
“What if I don’t get that promotion?”
The list of “what ifs” is endless, and they can be paralyzing.
But, here’s the reality of the situation… major truth bomb coming at you…
Are you ready?
You’re NOT good enough because you won’t allow yourself to be good enough!
Impostor syndrome is keeping you away from what you want.
Real talk time. So, yea, any of those negative “what ifs” can definitely happen.
But, what if you decide to enjoy the journey to wherever you’re going and embrace the uncertainty and potential for “failure.”
It can be flippin terrifying… I get it. But, it could also be incredible… life-changing!
What if you succeed?
Alright, friends, now that we’ve dragged ourselves into the impostor filled mud, how do we get out?
Struggling to find TIME to accomplish things? Check out MillenniALLI’s article about how to find more time in your day.
Step #1 Recognize your strengths and weaknesses
Big surprise here… No one and I mean NO ONE, is perfect or has it all.
Are you shocked?
I mean, looking around Instagram these days, you may think some people have it all… But, that’s just not reality.
It’s so easy to focus on all the negative or lacking things in our lives that may prevent us from attaining our goals and living our dreams. But, why is it terrifying to admit that we also have some pretty awesome abilities and strengths?
Let’s get something out of the way, shall we? Recognizing your skills and talents and showcasing them DOES NOT make you a bad or self-centered person.
Do me a favor and go ahead and grab a piece of paper.
You got it?
Now, if I were to call up your 3 closest friends what would they tell me you’re A-M-A-Z-I-N-G at?
Go ahead and write those 3 things down.
If you’re thinking, “Oh, I dunno…” then you’re not thinking hard enough!
If you really can’t think of anything, please call or text those friends RIGHT NOW and ask them the question. Because I’m willing to bet each one of them will have a pretty long list of things you kick butt at!
Now, here’s the real challenge… I want you to hold on to that list. And, the next time you’re getting ready to take on the world and doubt starts to creep up on you… look at it.
Remember that there are people who KNOW how awesome you are.
Remind yourself that it’s OK for you to recognize your awesomeness too!
Step #2 Know that you are enough
No matter where you are in your life at this very moment, know that you are enough.
You are enough for what you’re doing right now. And if that makes you happy, I say, “Rock on!”
And, if you want something else… something different, know that you ARE enough to make that happen too.
Sometimes the difference between failure and success is the simple act of not-so-gently convincing ourselves that we are good enough to make the things we want actually happen.
So, the next time you start to question your skills … your abilities… remind yourself that in every way shape and form, YOU are enough!
Step #3 Embrace failure
Winston Churchill said, “Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”
The reality is, at some point you’re going to fail at something.
Learn more about why we fail with MillenniALLI’s article on goals and New Year’s Resolutions.
It’s gonna suck.
And, if you’ve already failed at something. Rest easy knowing you’ll likely fail at something again…
Maybe it will be something small. Perhaps it will be something big.
Accepting the inevitability of failure seems scary. Because, who wants to fail?
But, embracing failure when it happens and using the experience to learn and grow… that’s the foundation for success.
And, we all want success!
Always remember that the path to success is littered with failures we CHOOSE to learn from instead of run away from.
FREE Online Course
- Check out MillenniALLI’s FREE Overcoming Impostor Syndrome Mini-Course.
After working in the non-profit, corporate, and start-up worlds for many years, Alli started MillenniALLI.com to help others navigate the twists and turns of the professional world. As a career and finance empowerer, she shares relatable, actionable, and sometimes witty, strategies to tackle everything from how to find a new job to saving money. A native New-Yorker, Alli has lived in 4 countries and even called the southern US state of Louisiana home for several years.
When she’s not connecting with the MillenniALLI community, you can find her on her yoga mat, working on DIY projects at her new home, and attempting to cook. You can connect with her on Facebook @MillenniALLI or by email at [email protected]
Thank you , we all have our doubts & insecurities time to time & it is very helpful post!
Thank you for taking the time to read it.
So glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you for your words. Imposter syndrome is some I am familiar with. It hasn’t always been easy, but I am overcoming my own self doubts :).
Yes, I think more people than we think has been hit by impostor syndrome at some point. Thank you for sharing, and keep going!
We definitely always doubt ourselves. If we stopped that we would be so much better!
You are right Ashli, we need to be more confident and trust our abilities.
Thank you for sharing!
Totally agree!
I experienced this a few years ago when I started my business. I wasn’t making enough profit and thought… What am I doing wrong? Am I not doing good enough? Self-doubt is paralyzing. It will cripple you and prevent you from taking action or moving forward. I was able to move forward when I realized (and acknowledged) that I failed and I learned so much from the experience. Thank you for the insightful post!
Polly, Thanks for sharing more about your experience. Glad you found value in the article!
Such a nice post to read. I’m always second guessing myself. Wanting to do something but worried of failing or not thinking I’m good enough. Thanks so much for sharing your post with us!
Glad you enjoyed the article, Martin!
Fear goes almost hand in hand with self doubt. Many of us are held back from our own successes because we are or own worst enemy. You need to keep fighting through it.
So true!
We’ve always not good for people who always keep judging you. Self-doubt is a serious thing issue. They always want they wanted but we always think about they were good enough confidence is the key just show who you are and be authentic such a lovely post!
It’s an awesome and meaningful post. Embracing failure is the key to future success.
Thank you, Sarah! Failure is part of life, so better to embrace and learn from it!
Now I know some root causes of self doubt. Thank you so much for the info.
thank you for reading Neil!
Failures are definitely stepping stones for success.
you are right!
Imposter Syndrome is such a menace. I have to actively fight it every single day and remind myself I am capable!
yes, it’s just an illusion, a bad one. Just keep moving forward!
I definitely struggle with feeling like I don’t know enough to have a point of view that is relevant.
Your opinion is always important, you don’t need to know everything or every angle around a subject to share an interesting point of view.
this imposter syndrome terminology is so accurate, I think everyone has probably experienced this to one degree or another. Great article!
Yes, I think the same. Impostor syndrome hurts everybody to some degree, especially when we try to move away from our comfort zone.
I find this post so useful and relatable. No matter how we say, I am confident but there are times that we are down and say, I am not good enough, and it really gives off a bad vibe. Yet, by recognizing our strengths and knowing that we have weaknesses too, and we are just human, we can overcome this down feeling.
Thank you for sharing this Clyde. You are totally right. It’s important to keep moving forward and keep doing things, that is the only way to fight this feeling of not being good enough.
Self doubt is toxic… we have one life, and there is no room to be worried about what other people think. We should throw ourselves into any challenge without fear, and I believe we would all surprise ourselves.
Yes, that’s it, everything shrinks when we think that the time we have is short and there is no room for doubts and fears.
thanks for sharing Laithan!
This is me most of the times. Great article, I finally have a name for my struggles. 🙂
Now that you put a name to that feeling, I’m sure you will be ready to beat it! Way to go Kristina!
I have went through this a long time back and came to terms. It is okay being an average person and that’s fine.
Being average is ok, as long as you don’t use it as an excuse to not doing everything you can to live life to the fullest.
Deep down you know if this truly makes you happy or not.
thanks for sharing your thoughts with us!
100% agree here, failure is just another excuse to bounce right back up!
exactly! one more step to the top